Tuesday, February 19, 2013

If I could write a letter to mom...It would read....

If I could write a letter to my mom in Heaven, here is what it would say....

Dear Mom,
It's your baby girl.  It's been one year since you've lived with Jesus.  Do you realize that?  Does it feel like you've just arrived?!!!  I miss you.  It's just like it was yesterday that you left.  It's taken a really long time to wrap my mind around you not being here on earth.  I miss our phone calls, laughs, and jocularity.  I miss your hugs, giving heart, and the ability to make friends like nothing. 

These days, King Jesus is taking really great care of me.  He's reassuring me that everything will be ok and that He has my best interest at heart.  Mama, what's Heaven like?  I'm sure when you first saw it, it took your breath away.  I'm sure that you probably can't even describe it.  It's a part of the great mystery the Bible talks about.  What's it like to worship King Jesus every day?  What's the music in Heaven like?  I bet it's beautiful.  Mama, have you met all of the saints of old?  If I were a betting person, I'd say you're still at the feet of Jesus thanking Him for all of His blessings.  I wonder if you'll ever leave His feet.  My guess is probably not.

Can you see down here on earth?  I've adopted the thought that you can't.  It helps me to go on, relying on Jesus Himself alone.  He's more than enough, and I"m sure if you could come back you'd tell me that.  The tears flow a little less these days, but my heart will always have this void because you aren't here.

The book is almost done.  I promise to make Jesus famous through it.  Our beautiful life here on earth will always be a treasure to me.  I will never forget the day King Jesus made you my mom!  You meant the world to me and I will forever be thankful to Jesus for making you my mom.

I don't know when I'll get to Heaven.  Only God knows that day.  Trust me though, I'm counting down the days until I get to see you again.  My faith will then become sight, the tears will dry, and together we will worship Jesus together.  I love you and I miss you.  Have a great day around God's throne today.  I miss you, and I love you!

Your baby girl.

Who Jesus has been to me since loosing mom

Today, I'd like to speak from my heart.  Tomorrow is the one year mark of my mom's death.  It left me completely parentless.  Jesus has been my Father. 

After mom died I felt like somebody had droppped me off at the door of an orphanage with a big sign that said, DEAL WITH IT.  Angry, sad, numb, and alone I began to pick up the pieces of my broken heart and carry on with life.    I'd pray this prayer every day for about six weeks:  "Dear God, get me though this day.  That's it today God, Amen." 

I got angry with God.  I even asked, "God are you really there?  Why would you leave me like this with no parents?"  He lovingly let me vent and get it all out.  He carried me and loved me unconditionally through those tough days.  I'd sit in my pew and put on my church face and give the canned answers that everybody gives when they walk into church.  "Everything is fine."  Yeah right, it wasn't fine and I was heartbroken.

One day at church we had a visiting comedian who finished the service with a song called "The Family of God."  I'd sang it growing up and never paid much attention to the words UNTIL this particular Sunday. 

"From the door of an orphanage to the house of the King,
No longer an outcast, a new song I sing.

From rags until riches from the weak to the strong,
I'm not worthy to be here, but praise God I belong.

I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God,
I've been washed in the fountain, cleansed by His blood.
Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod,
For I'm part of the family, the family of God.

I was a mess.  I cried all the way home.  God sweetly and gently reminded me that I was a part of His family and had been since age 9.  I'm His baby girl and He has carried me through these tough days.  He's reminded me that I'm His baby girl and that one day I'll be Home with Him. 

Later on in 2012 He gave me one last reminder through His Word.  John 14:18:  "I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you."  That was enough for me.

Jesus, He's been my Father.  He's more than enough even on days when I miss mom the most!

A tearful,

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Are you clogged?!!!

This afternoon I was dealing with a clogged up sink.  It has become a point of frustration.  As I began to pour the solution down the drain God quietly painted me a picture.   He said, "That is what sin does in your life."  It clogs you up. 

The gunk, and filthiness of sin build up over time until it is just like my sink drain.  Dirty and stagnant.  Sin stinks.  It's not pretty and the more you let it accumulate the uglier it can become.  Have you become stagnant in your walk with Christ and let sin clog you up?  It's time to do something about it right?!!!

So, what is the solution to a clogged up Christian heart?!!!  Repentance! Once you repent and head in the other direction no longer allowing sin to clog you up, life can begin again!  It's not easy but it's doable!  A daily dose of God's Word, and constant prayer will keep your heart pure and right before God!

Are you clogged up Christian?!!!